Thursday, April 12, 2007

Friends


After reading rel's blog about friendship, I decided to join in on the topic. It really got me to think about my friendships and how I decided who I consider a friend.

I consider myself very lucky to have the best friends that I have. ( I am sure you will hear a lot about them in posts to come). I have known C for 17 years, which is over half my life. I can remember the first time I met her, what she was wearing and why I didn't like her. It was home room, 7th grade and I was sitting in the middle of the room with my friends from 6th grade, Mike and Jill. C prances ( she would dispute the prance, but it was a prance) into the room with her long hair, jean overalls with pink cuffs, long sleeve shirt and pink sneakers. She flings her hair over her shoulder and sits two seats ahead of me. I didn't like her because she was too girlie and pink. ( a good reason in 7th grade) Needless to say we became best of friends later that same day, thanks to Science class and a bottle of Elmer's glue.

Then there is S. We met in 9th grade but didn't become best of friends until a year or two later. The best way to describe S, the energizer bunny. She has more energy then the 1st graders she teaches and is always multi-tasking even when just watching her favorite show on TV. The great thing about S is that she can make you laugh, even when you don't want to.

C and S started out as just friends but over the years they have become my sisters. We can finish each other thoughts, have bought each other the same Christmas cards ( yep the same exact one) and have similar dreams in the same week. I can't imagine my life without them. They know me better than anyone in my life ( well except for my mom). The bond we share has only grown stronger over the years.

This leads me back to rel's post and expectations. I have been told in the past that my expectations of "friends" in my life are set too high. That no one I meet now will ever become friends like S and C. I agree, S and C are irreplaceable but does that mean that I am only allowed two best friends? According to some we are lucky that we have remained friends this long even after they moved to a different state. I think, like any relationship, we have worked hard to keep our friendship. I do have expectations of people I meet and befriend. I would hope we all have expectations of people in our lives. I expect my friends to love me for who I am, to support me when I need it and to depend on me when they need it. Why you may ask? That is what I provide to my friends.

I have learned over the past few years that there are different types of friends. L is a friend that I have had for at least 10 years. We have shared a lot of memories in those years. L was our "party" friend. She was always up for anything and always knew where the good place to hang out was. As we all do, she grew up and partying wasn't what she was into anymore. She got married and has two beautiful little boys. Which I was there to meet each of them minutes after they were born. The great thing about L, she always is in a good mood no matter what life throws her. I wish I could be more like that!!

Then there are the friends I met at work. At first, they thought I was quiet and shy, man were they wrong!! I don't ever stop talking, silence makes me uncomfortable, and I believe conversations bring people closer to one another. I like to know things about people. I don't mean gossip but things, like their favorite smell, favorite holiday, where they went to school, stuff like that. That is what takes someone from just "Good Morning" to friend in the workplace. I have made great friends through work. Mary was one of the first. She sat in the cube ahead of me and we both had the same thought about one another, she is quiet. I am not sure how Mary and I even got to talking but once it started, it was like we were friends for years. Mary is about 20 years older than me but I would have never guessed that, we had so much in common. Tom was another friend I made at work, he is just funny. When I started the new job, he was out of the office at a toy convention. At the time, I thought that sounded extremely odd, a grown man at a toy convention but once I started to inquire about it, I realized how much time and effort he puts into the figurines/toys he makes. There are others but Tom and M were the first ones. The friends you make at work make it easier to get up every morning and go to work. For me, it was like having a second family, a dysfunctional one but one none the least.

Friendship is different for everyone but you should always keep in mind that the new people that come into your life might just be the next C and S. You just have to except them for who they are and expect they will do the same in return.

--- Well that is my first real post, I hope you enjoyed :)

1 comment:

rel said...

Chipper,
Way to go! See, you're a natural blogger.

btw. I read a study once that said, women keep and increase their number of friendships as they grow older. Men on the other hand do the opposite. Interesting huh?
rel